First in a continuing series of

How To Make Yourself Happier

1. If you can, stop doing stuff you hate.

Jeff's got a zillion pair of white socks...and though I remember buying him bags of (eight to twelve) identical pair, sorting and rolling them is a stone bitch. There are the ones without the ridge thingie at the top, the ones with it but without reinforced toes, the ones with gray heels (no, they *came* that way...it says absolutely nothing about my l*ndry skills.;), the ones with the gray heels and toes and the ones with the red thread reinforcing the toes. Along with at least one variation on each theme listed. I HATE doing this.

But, every time I do laundry, I do it.

Till today. I realized that no one is holding a gun to my head, making me roll socks...that this is something that makes me unhappy while I'm doing it, and they're not even *my* socks!

Besides all that, no one's even asked me to do it. I generally do the laundry and the folding, but it wasn't assigned to me, and there's not a thing in the world preventing him from sorting and rolling his own socks.

I doubt he'll mind, either. For one thing, once I tell him how much I hate doing it, he'll tell me to stop. And for another, he's far less of a perfectionist about this sort of thing (sometimes I can stop myself from unrolling the completed but slightly mis-matched socks to get perfect pairs...most times I can't.) and this half hour/forty-five minute job will probably take him five.

2. The opinions of those around you don't get less valid because they love you.

This one's been a long time coming. I totally bought into the whole "Well, sie *has* to say that, sie loves you." thing, from the time I was in my early teens.

My Nan and Boomps loved me unabashedly, without any strings attached. They thought I was smart, funny, beautiful, and could do any damn thing I set my mind to.

I appreciated that, but figured they *had* to say that...they loved me, and they were my grandparents, after all.

My mom loves me unabashedly, with as few strings as humanly possible. She thinks I'm smart, funny, beautiful and that I can do any damn thing I set my mind to.

I appreciate that, but, you know...she's my *mom*.

Jeff loves me. Unabashedly and we're working on the strings. He thinks I'm smart, funny, beautiful and that I can do any damn thing I set my mind to.

I appreciate that...but he's my SO...if he doesn't think that, isn't something wrong?

Well, yeah, but there's more wrong with me rejecting all these opinions (and more, from friends and Family over the years.)...these are the people who've not only seen me at my best and worst, but first thing in the morning, when I'm in ferocious pain and when I'm just everyday boring.

And I'm supposed to value the opinion of people I don't know/aren't well acquainted with over them? Who came up with *that* bit of idiocy? I suppose it is easier for advertisers to tell us what we need if they make their opinions more important than the people who are actually a part of our lives. Its definitely something I'll be actively fighting from now on.

More to follow as it comes to me.

First in a continuing series of

How To Make Yourself Happier

1. If you can, stop doing stuff you hate.

Jeff's got a zillion pair of white socks...and though I remember buying him bags of (eight to twelve) identical pair, sorting and rolling them is a stone bitch. There are the ones without the ridge thingie at the top, the ones with it but without reinforced toes, the ones with gray heels (no, they *came* that way...it says absolutely nothing about my l*ndry skills.;), the ones with the gray heels and toes and the ones with the red thread reinforcing the toes. Along with at least one variation on each theme listed. I HATE doing this.

But, every time I do laundry, I do it.

Till today. I realized that no one is holding a gun to my head, making me roll socks...that this is something that makes me unhappy while I'm doing it, and they're not even *my* socks!

Besides all that, no one's even asked me to do it. I generally do the laundry and the folding, but it wasn't assigned to me, and there's not a thing in the world preventing him from sorting and rolling his own socks.

I doubt he'll mind, either. For one thing, once I tell him how much I hate doing it, he'll tell me to stop. And for another, he's far less of a perfectionist about this sort of thing (sometimes I can stop myself from unrolling the completed but slightly mis-matched socks to get perfect pairs...most times I can't.) and this half hour/forty-five minute job will probably take him five.

2. The opinions of those around you don't get less valid because they love you.

This one's been a long time coming. I totally bought into the whole "Well, sie *has* to say that, sie loves you." thing, from the time I was in my early teens.

My Nan and Boomps loved me unabashedly, without any strings attached. They thought I was smart, funny, beautiful, and could do any damn thing I set my mind to.

I appreciated that, but figured they *had* to say that...they loved me, and they were my grandparents, after all.

My mom loves me unabashedly, with as few strings as humanly possible. She thinks I'm smart, funny, beautiful and that I can do any damn thing I set my mind to.

I appreciate that, but, you know...she's my *mom*.

Jeff loves me. Unabashedly and we're working on the strings. He thinks I'm smart, funny, beautiful and that I can do any damn thing I set my mind to.

I appreciate that...but he's my SO...if he doesn't think that, isn't something wrong?

Well, yeah, but there's more wrong with me rejecting all these opinions (and more, from friends and Family over the years.)...these are the people who've not only seen me at my best and worst, but first thing in the morning, when I'm in ferocious pain and when I'm just everyday boring.

And I'm supposed to value the opinion of people I don't know/aren't well acquainted with over them? Who came up with *that* bit of idiocy? I suppose it is easier for advertisers to tell us what we need if they make their opinions more important than the people who are actually a part of our lives. Its definitely something I'll be actively fighting from now on.

More to follow as it comes to me.